It’s not me – it is you (DW#499)
The opposite of taking responsibility for everything is to deny responsibility even for the things that I CAN control.
When we suffer from this cognitive distortion, we tend to blame all our actions and reactions on others.
You made me mad.
It is because of you that I over ate tonight.
It is my friend’s fault that I am late because she would not hang up the phone.
Everyone was smoking so I could not help myself.
I lied to you because you cannot bear the truth.
What is the problem with thinking like this? You live your entire life feeling like a victim. If your actions are controlled by others, then you cannot change them, can you? You must wait until others change before you will see a change in your life.
I would not hold my breath for that!
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