Find a way to validate your reality(DW# 790)
With someone trying to mess with your sense of reality, it can feel very isolating. When you begin to question your own perceptions, it can be difficult to reach out to others for fear of appearing crazy. But you will need to up your game of self-care and building resources for yourself in order to maintain your mental and emotional wellbeing. You will need to find ways to validate your reality and to sort out truth from distortion.
Here are two suggestions:
The first is journaling.
Write down your conversations with the gaslighter in a journal so you can take an objective look at it. Where is the conversation veering off from reality into the other person’s view? Can you see patterns of responses when you bring up any area of conflict or question their behaviour? Do you recognize any phrases or statements that they consistently use from the ones we have discussed?
The second is to develop your own support system.
You need other people in your life who can confirm your reality and worth. Gaslighters often try to isolate their victims or force them into silence in order to stay in control. To counter act this, you need to spend time with friends and family. Check out your perceptions by talking to trustworthy friends or professionals or people who witnessed what the gaslighter is calling into question.
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